March 2004 Archives

Ashley at the San Francisco Zoo in November of 1983.

Now Nate is awake and I think John is home. This is crazy. I need to sleep!!! Nate has school tomorrow so I have to not only get up, but I have to get out. I think I'm tired enough to sleep through the whining. I'll go try again.

Ashley again, with me and Tess. It's strange that she is twenty two now. It's even stranger that while I remember the quilt on the floor and the picture on the wall and the bedspread covering the couch, I have no memory of that lamp. I love it.

You should see my mom's house now, by the way. It is really wonderfully redone (not the first time since that was taken, either) and I'm sort of afraid to visit with all my kids. When she and my step dad got married, we moved into his bachelor pad. So, I'm rambling, but I owe a picture of my mom's current house. We need to get that digital camera now that the tax refund has arrived.

Will Willow go back to sleep???

When I started scanning photos it was still my very wonderful and talented and cool sister's birthday. But I am slow and untechnical, so now yesterday was her birthday. Happy Birthday, Ashley!

So much has been going on, which gives me too many things to pick from now. Nothing terribly important. I took Willow to the eye doctor (we love him) who takes care of Nate and he said her strabisimus is nothing to worry about. Slowly things are getting back to normal around here.

Warm weather means sippy cups left out mold fast. The milk ones make cheese. I'll be grateful when our household has moved beyond sippy cups. Lex and Soph saw the dentist and they both have no cavities. It must be that their fairy godmothers (or maybe they have the same one?) are so disgusted with me that they come brush the kids' teeth at night. Soph certainly ought to have some cavities.

So, the "sniper incident," as the parents at Lex's school have dubbed it, has a tiny follow up. Turns out the boy who was shot is my friend's son. I called her and she was steamed, to say the least. The police did take the gun and drive the boys home. They were issued a ticket. I heard a rumor that they'll have a hearing. It still seems so half-assed to me. How about some counseling or community service? How about a trip to the morgue or prison to see that those places aren't too cool in reality? I suppose I don't have a good solution, but it seems like what happened was too spooky for a wrist slapping.

Nate's gymnastics class ended today and Lexy's play will be this weekend. Their next activity will be rock climbing. I'm glad. This play is ridiculous! Not the play, but the drama surrounding it. First off, there is a fee to participate. (We go through the local recreation/community center.) Then there is a nominal fee, ten bucks, to rent a costume. There are photos, like school photos, to buy. A t-shirt. The tickets, even for parents, are five dollars each. But the kicker is the photography and video ban. No pictures or videos of the performance. I brought my video camera to the dress rehearsal tonight and was told I could only tape parts my child was in. Because why? Because a professional company will be taping the show and we are supposed to buy a video or dvd from them. They can kiss my ass. One of the dads pointed out that the company will be using our children's images to make a profit without our consent. The next play he does will NOT be with these lame people. Also, no flowers for the performers unless they are given to them outside the theatre. They will hold any flowers that people bring at the ticket desk. So no one will have their feelings hurt. And, the date and time were changed and just finalized tonight, five days before the show. So, I'll have to scout around for a more professional outfit next time. Too much drama!

Nate has school tomorrow, so I should turn in.

Tonight's dinner was good and ready in 35 minutes! Curried chickpeas (cause you know that chickpeas taste better than garbanzo beans for some reason!) with tofu and tomatoes over coconut rice. Yum yum yum. Moosewood Cooks at Home.

It was so warm for a few days there and now it's pretty cool. I keep thinking I should be getting Halloween costumes ready rather than springy baskets.

The past two days have been eventful. Where to start?? Let's see, I'll talk about people distant to me and work my way inward.

My friend D's nephew fell onto his snowboard and nearly cut his hand off, which meant several hours of surgery for him. Our mutual friend fell and broke her leg severely enough to require surgery. My grandmother's cousin passed away.

The rat snake died. John got a teatnus shot. Willow saw a nutritionist who suggested I feed her carnation instant breakfast and sent me home with a free box of the stuff. (What's healthiest in that product, the artificial flavors, the sugar or the caffeine in the "cappucino" flavor?)

Sophie opened the front door. Willow crawled out of it, but she didn't navigate the step down to the porch well. She landed on her face and when I picked her up her mouth was bloody. She seems to be okay, but I was sure she'd knocked out all her teeth.

Lexy's female classmate, K, (yes, the one he wanted to go to the nudist resort with) asked him to have sex with her. These are first graders for goodness sake! I didn't know he had a clue what that might mean. So I asked him, "What did that mean?" He said, "It's when a boy's penis touches a girl's vagina."

"Oh," I said.

"But I don't want to do that, Mom, so don't worry."

"Did K tell you that?"

"Naw, P (another girl in the class) told me a long time ago."

I told him I was very proud that he'd made the right choice. We talked about how it isn't something that kids do, and that lots of families didn't even want their kids to know about it. I told him he could talk to me or to John and that we'd answer any questions he had about it, but that he really needed to not talk to his brother or other kids about it. He agreed. I don't know if he'll be able to resist the temptation though. Kids love to have top secret info to share.

First grade!! I was hoping this wouldn't come up for another year or so. The funny thing was that John came in on the conversation after Lex had explained things to me and he asked John, "Do you know what sex is?" John said that, yeah, he knew about it. Lexy said, "Oh, well, Mom had no idea!" I guess his friend didn't explain the connection between sex and babies!

Oh, there's lots of other things, but I'm tired so I'll end with this doozy. Here's an email I got tonight from our school group, edited to leave out names.

I believe the entire (our school) and (school we share site with) communities are in need of immediate, clear and thorough communication about this week's sniper incident. We need to know what the police did and plan to do about it, and what our school and district officials are doing to address valid concerns about campus safety as well as the fears of our children.

Our first-grader told us about it this morning. She knew that after school on
Monday, a (o s) student in the on-campus daycare program was shot in the back with
a pellet gun by teenagers who were up on the roof of (s s). She'd heard
about it from a classmate who goes to the daycare program and who told her that
now he's scared to go back there.

From the parent of the injured student, I learned that the daycare teacher
responded immediately and appropriately by bringing all the children inside and
calling 911. I'm told that when the police arrived, the teenagers had come down
from the roof but were still hanging out in front of the pre-school, apparently
making no attempt to flee or hide their weapon. The police questioned them, as
well as the injured student and another daycare student who witnessed the
shooting. The police examined the welt on the child's back. The witness even
gave the police the pellet that his friend had been shot with.

However, the police officers apparently didn't charge the shooters with assault
or any other crime. They didn't take them into custody until their parents could
came to the police station. They didn't confiscate their weapon. As of the next
morning, they apparently hadn't even informed either principal about this
incident.

Throughout the epidemic of school violence in our country, a common refrain
seems to be that somebody knew in advance about threats or weapons being brought
to campus, but never told anyone. Here the police had a rare opportunity to
act swiftly and decisively in response to a blatant act of violence and
intimidation--but they utterly failed to do their job.

To the teens, the police have sent the message that shooting at kids from a
rooftop is no big deal--just child's play. To the children of (o s) and
(s s) Schools, they have sent the message that even the police can't or
won't keep them safe from harm. To the school staff and parents, they've sent
the message that we're on their own to deal with violence on our campus.

It seems that many of our children and parents have heard about this incident and are
very upset. I hope the following questions will be addressed as soon as possible,
because the rumors are flying...

1) Who is following up with the police--and how?

2) Why are we parents hearing about this first from our children?

3) What is being done to address our children's fears?

4) What can we all do to make our campus safer?

Thank you,

Where to start with that??? I'm not so sure I want to send my child to school tomorrow.

Preschool went rather well. Nate is a funny guy. I'm not so much a preschool person, really. I like having my kids with me and feel like they go off to school soon enough. My children are pretty social (ahem, that would be an understatement) and I'm not worried about acedemic stuff until they get older. In any event, I wasn't forcing Nate to attend preschool, if that is how it may have sounded. He asked to go and so I signed him up. He got over not wanting to go once he got there and saw his cubby with his name on it. I took a few pictures and will put them up if I ever get to the developing place.

Is there anyone else on the planet who has had a disagreement with their seven year old over whether or not he or she can attend a playdate at a nudist resort? I told him no because I don't think the people there want to be gawked at by him. (I didn't put it to him quite like that, though.) If I were comfortable going I might take him, but the chances of me swimming naked during the day with a bunch of strangers are so very very slim. Plus he's a little too old to play naked with his classmate if you ask me.

Today we argued over the fact that when ever it's my turn to bring snack for his class I pick something healthy and the other moms bring trix. I told him the other moms were breaking the rules, that snack is supposed to be healthy and that we will not bring junk food. He threatened to tell his teacher and his therapist that I am mean and never listen to him or do what he wants. What will I do with this boy when he is a teenager? And who complains to their mom when she gets pretzel sticks and strawberries for snack?? I think next time I'll do celery sticks and raisins and just see how he likes that. The good thing was that when we finally got things worked out he said, "I guess that trix aren't so good anyway because when I'm at my dad's I see lots of commericals for it so it probably isn't that great." Yay!! I've been telling him that people make commercials for products because the product isn't good enough to sell itself. I told him that the people selling those things had to give prizes or trick people into getting their products because the products weren't very good. And he listened to me! Score one for mom against mainstream media! Turned out he meant the yougurt and not the cereal, but still, I won't get bright blue yogurt for a class snack.

I do need to sleep. This morning after I dropped Nate off, I forgot where I parked the van and thought it had been stolen or towed away. The women working in the office at the school were most likely not impressed by my dazzling intellect. At least I found it before they called the police for me. Yeah, it was a little embarassing.

Here's to a day without any appointments! Hooray Tuesday!!

And here's the pinto bean and avocado salad receipe (from the Vegetarian 5 Ingredient Gourmet):

two sixteen ounce cans pinto beans, drained and rinsed
3 medium tomatoes, diced
2 or 3 tablespoons minced fresh cilantro
1/3 to 1/2 cup vinaigrette
freshly ground pepper
1 large avocado, diced (the instructions say, "pitted, peeled and diced, but I think we all know that avocado pits and peels aren't good salad ingredients)

Combine all but avo in serving bowl and toss. Stir in avo just before serving.

And Deb, if you don't already have that book it's nice for quick meals. I love love love Vegan Planet, too.

Nate starts school tomorrow. This was such an exciting prospect for him until about two hours ago. I don't know if he'll go in the morning or not. I'll try to convince him. Maybe it won't be so scary when the sun's up.

John bought me a cd today, so I'm listening to the latest Mazzy Star disc, which is eight years old. I get there eventually.

We have all sorts of gore around here; Soph skinned both her knees, my nose piercing is icky all of a sudden and John has an injured hand. I'm sure he will write about it later tonight.

I am sleepy sleepy sleepy.

I'm all ready to cook dinners this week. We'll have penne putanesca (without the anchovies); green chili /tomato quesedillas and an avocado and pinto bean salad; pineapple and peanut stew over rice. . . I'm getting hungry again.

I ought to get some rest so I can get Nate to school in the morning. The hardest part will be getting Sophie to leave after we drop him off. She always is begging to, "go to cass and da payground." I'll brew some strong coffee in a few hours.

We got to go to the doctor again today. A different one. Willow has recently visited the
cardiologist
pediatrician
physical therapist
urgent care doctor
immunologist
gastrointerologist
and sweet lab guy who apologizes over and over for drawing her blood.

None of them are ever on time except the physical therapist and the sweet lab guy. Next week we will see the nutritionist after I keep a meticulous record of everything the little girl child puts in her mouth for 72 hours. Soon after, the opthamologist (I know it's spelled incorrectly, I am too lazy to use the dictionary and besides you know what I mean, right?) and I suppose a neurologist to administer the eeg.

She is such a little old woman.

I'm listening to a band called Six Organs of Admittance, but since the picture of the album doesn't appear on the listy thing, I won't put it on the list. Sometimes I'm such a virgo.

The pop up thing is getting me down. I turn on the pop up blocker and it lets the junk through while blocking the pop up tools I want to use. Annoying.

Tomorrow we'll all (except Lex who'll be at school) go to Hidden Villa with John while he does his volunteer gig leading six year olds around the farm. I hope we don't get him fired from his volunteer job.

Think I'll sleep some. If you want to read some of my short fiction click here or here or here. Don't complain if it's bad. The whole point is to make them only a page and very raw and drafty like. (by the way -- as Nate is so so fond of saying these days -- if you want to read John's stories, he's J)

And while I'm at it, here are sites for two very talented friends, one from New York City I've never met or even spoken to, and one who has on more than one occasion had to eat dinner here with all of us and watch children's films of questionable quality while being crawled on and called by the wrong name.

I took Willow to the doctor today and got all sorts of good news! Her tube came out, which is so good I can't accurately describe the goodness. Her wonky IgA level is now normal (low normal, but normal) and all the other immune system stuff tested last week came out fine. Her ear infection is better. The doctor thinks the eye thing is just an eye thing and is sending her to an eye thing doctor. She'll also have an eeg to rule out any siezure activity, but the doctor isn't worried. We see the GI tomorrow to talk about, well, about poop, really. She also needs to continue with the physical therapist until she gets better at drinking liquids. She has a hard time moving fluid to the back of her mouth and hasn't mastered the sippy cup or regular cup or bottle. I can give her liquids with a spoon or syringe. I feel like I can breathe again, and I didn't realize how much I wasn't breathing until I felt a little better.

You haven't smelled ick until you've smelled snake barf. Oh. Good. Lord. What a nasty foul stench that was. I get queasy just typing that. Good thing John cleaned it up. If I had to do it I would have just thrown the cage away, snake and all. I am not kidding. Sorry, snake.

I visited Hearthsong and ordered some spring time bunny items for the kids. I love Easter. It's like all the fun of Christmas with hardly any stress. You get to wake up early, watch the kids get gifts, eat a slow and decadent breakfast in your pjs and play. And while they check out the new stuff, you can drink coffee and read the paper at a leisurely pace and sneak some of their candy while they aren't looking.

I saw this meme (I know what that word means, but what is it? Anyone?) around a few places. I haven't done one in ages, so I'll just tuck it away here.

I've been reading blogs and thouroughly (whoo! do I ever miss blogger's spell checker!) enjoying myself. The kids keep waking up for brief moments. Luckily I was able to guide Nate to the bathroom before he could pee on the floor.

Speaking of pee, Soph has been going tinkle in the potty. Pretty soon I'll only have one child in diapers. That's good future light for the tunnel.

It's like summer here, 87 degrees yesterday. Can anyone explain why 87 degrees is so much hotter in August than it is in March?

The pop-up blocker is on but nobody is home. They keep getting through. They are trying to sell me (there's another two of them) pot. Wrong demographic, dude. I need no pot, I have free sleep deprivation to keep me loopy.

I had an elaborate dream that included (among other weirdness) me having the job of organizing all the white house (not W, just a dream prez) Christmas (another pop-up, for cigarettes!) festivities. Ewww. I was glad to wake up. The dream also involved a grisly murder and body disposal and me taping up a woman's nose, but you aren't interested. It's funny about the tape; I have to tape the feeding tube to Willow's nose so she won't pull it out and I know that's why it was in there.

Tonight's dinner was alrighty. Warm pita bread; brown rice ( I know, I know, but it was so good!) cooked with veg bullion and tossed with scallions and spinach and a little butter; and a lentil salad with feta, tomatoes, scallions and vinagarette. Willow and Nate both loved the rice. Brown rice! I got two of my kids to eat brown rice. Sophie would have tried it, but she was returned home sleeping which was no surprise since she wouldn't nap today. Tomorrow is a veggie sandwich concoction with pepperoncini and olives and capers and whatnot. If I remember to get the bread, that is. Must go to store. Must go to bed, I'm sort of dozing off a little. I hate going to bed sometimes. I just want to do so much while the kids are asleep.

Here is the article I mentioned. And here is the website of the place that takes you to the islands.

And here is Flooded Lizard Kingdom! Don't miss the personal ad saga.

the link button is ridiculously easy

now for some kind of spell-checker

We had a good blend of productiveness and lay about at the park on the perfect day ness. Willow got to swing in the baby swing, play in the sand and explore the grass. The big kids weren't with us, so the pace was slow and we were able to lay in the shade of the wonderful old oak trees, watching spider webs and gnats float against the bluest sky.

I read an article in the paper about Ventura, Ca. I want to go there sometime with all the kids (and John, to course!) and take a boat to the Channel Islands. That is much more appealing to me than say, Disneyland.

I added Flooded Lizard Kingdom to the list on the left. I'd link to it here, but am having trouble getting the link button to wake up.

Time for me to sleep, too.

I'm still LOVING the Jolie Holland CD. She has a new one coming next month. Yay!

Willow woke up this morning with an alarming rash that started on her neck and trunk and quickly made the rounds of the rest of her. I took her to the urgent care, stopping at my mom's on the way for a sudafed because the flowering trees were making my eyes water and itch so badly I could hardly drive and Sophie was throwing a fit when I left home without her so I couldn't go back. I showed Willow's bumps to my mom and she said it looked like chicken pox. It did. Not watery blisters, but the shape of the rash.

I got to the urgent care and stood outside for a good twenty minutes or so (no rashy folk in the waiting room!) before we were put into an exam room. I spent the twenty minutes babbling and singing to Willow that she was a measle weasel, because the nurse said she looked "measlely." We weighed her and !!!!! she gained a pound over the last ten days. That bodes well for feeding tube removal, I think. The doctor walked in and right away was able to diagnose not chicken pox and not measles, but a rash from the amoxicillin that she'd finished over 24 hours earlier (a ten day dose) for last week's ear infection. So now when I make those multiple trips to the doctor with her next week I can say, "penicillin," when they ask if she's allergic to any medicines.

We did go to the museum. It was great to get out and specifically to go there. All the kids had fun playing at the water exhibit and Lexy got to make a corn husk superman. Willow played in the early childhood center, crawling about and playing with blocks and trains. We came home and I made dinner and we watched Tuck Everlasting. Later in the evening John and I got to sit on the couch and have a real honest conversation. We weren't interrupted to clean up or pour or wipe anything. Yay!

I don't seem to have anything to say. I'm listening to a new CD that John bought, Jodie Holland Catalpa. I really like her.

We made pizza, crust and all, from scratch. It was pretty good. Whenever I make something Nate likes he says, "Mom, this is scratch."

Tomorrow we'll brave the Children's Museum. 'Twill be fun.

For all those people who think I am so laid back and unruffleable, here is a list of the things that I've been worrying about tonight:

Willow's misaligned eyes and the doctor's comment that if things aren't improved by next week, she'll need a CT scan Of her brain

The new blood work that has to be done tomorrow to see if Willow has any other immune problems along with her low low IgA count

The van really needs some attention Mechanical and hygenic

I just signed Nate up for preschool at the local highschool (where I graduated from a couple (cough cough) of years back) and it suddenly struck me that I ought to worry about a school shooting happening there while he's there

I can't seem to find a spell check tool on the typepad layout and I think errors are being made

I fell asleep for an hour or so while putting the kids to bed and I had a terrible dream. The kind that makes me wish that a) Jung were alive, and b) I knew him well enough to call him and wake him up and ask him to explain it to me. Ugh.

Willow has yet another medical issue to contend with. Since Saturday every time she wakes up her eyes are unfocused. That's an understatement. They are both turned outward. I think it's both, it's hard to tell. Nate had a similar problem which ended up needing surgery. I hope that whatever is causing Willow's eyes to do this is along those same lines. Not the surgery part, but the part where it is only caused by weak eye muscles and not something I don't want to think about. (So, of course that's what I dreamt of.)

QUIT PICKING ON MY BABY, UNIVERSE

I feel stupid complaining since I know that there are so many kids out there with all the scary stuff parents try to not think about. But it has turned into a long string of semi-serious, sorta mysterious ailments and we'd all feel better (especially Willow) if that ended now.

I'm just sayin.

John sings Willow a song with the lyrics, "Willow hose-nose chucklehead."

Soph with her haul.

It's been awhile since I put up pictures. I can't figure out how to get more than one in a post, though. Here's my little guy with some Christmas loot.

What I really want is a new haircut, but with four kids sleeping in the other room and what with it being after midnight and all, I'll have to settle for a new blog. How does it look when I toss my head??